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 BEAR: Did you hear? Charlie lost his wife. HOOKER: That's a damn shame. How's he doing?  BEAR: About how you'd expect.  HOOKER: I expect he's already forgotten about her and is   thinking about writing a novel about it. BEAR::That's a hell of a thing to say. He must be grieving fierce. HOOKER: He's still a writer. Don't you remember what he said when Mary 's daughter commited suicide? "It's all material." BEAR: How do you mean?  HOOKER: He told her to stop crying and write a poem about it. BEAR: Well, she's a poet. She probably will! HOOKER: But in her own sweet time.  (A pause.) BEAR: I can't decide whether or not to send him a card. HOOKER: Waste of money. BEAR: Listen to Mr. Empathy. What put you in such a foul mood? HOOKER: I made the mistake of watching the news this morning. What's happening to this country is appalling. BEAR: Tell me about it. HOOKER: Anyway, I am sorry for his loss. Tell him when you see him. BEAR: Tell...

Previous: https://thoobasa.blogspot.com/2025/03/when-friend-is-grieving.html HOOKER: I'm sorry for your loss. STEVE: Thank you. BEAR: Steve is trying to figure out what to do with the writing Charlie left behind.  STEVE: There's a ton of it. Journals, novels, poems, a couple plays. Hard copy, stuff on his computer. I had no idea he was so prolific. HOOKER: I thought he was published. STEVE: He published a lot actually. This is in addition to that. But most of what he did publish was by small print on demand publishers. That's just short of self publishing. BEAR: Which gets no respect at all. STEVE: Which dad never understood and I don't either. A rock band cuts their own record in a garage, and it's treated with respect, it's even cool. But publish your own volume of poetry, you just admitted failure. You self publush because real publishers reject you. HOOKER: Have you tried libraries? Maybe his alma mater? STEVE: No interest whatever. He's not famous. He d...

 BEAR: This is my granddaughter, Heather. HOOKER: Nice to meet you. HEATHER: I've heard so much about you. HOOKER:You didn't have to tell me that. HEATHER: All good! BEAR: She performed her Woody Guthrie show at the universitry last night. You missed one hell of a performance.  HOOKER: I had a conflict. BEAR: Timbers tickets! Our esteemed and retired professor of American Studies prefers sports to art. HOOKER: I'm not a rich man. I bought season tickets I can't afford. I like to use them. HEATHER: I may be doing the university again this summer. BEAR: Really? HEATHER: They said they wanted to bring me back. BEAR: That's great. HOOKER: The word is awesome, Bear. Have you done the show other places? HEATHER: Right now the show is my job. BEAR: I didn't know that. HEATHER: I've had very generous grant support. I've performed throughout the Northwest, at universities and colleges, performing arts centers, senior centers, labor picnics, union halls. I even pe...

 BEAR: I just finished an incredible book: the Age of American Unreason. HOOKER: By Susan Jacoby. I know it. It's a follow up to Hofstadter's Anti Intellectualism in American Life.  BEAR: She mentions this. HOOKER: The thing is, Bear, that it's always been the age of unreason here. Look at what Mencken was writing in the twenties. I recently came across a quotation that sounds like he's describing today. I bet I can find it. (He starts searching on his smart phone.) BEAR: Today people present "alternative science" as if it's a real thing. They believe Thomas Jefferson led prayer sessions. If you have an education, you're "elitist." People are proud of their ignorance! It's unreal. HOOKER: Here it is. (Reading) "On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart’s desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron. The Evening Sun, Baltimore (26 July 1920)," BEAR: I'm not s...

 BEAR: I visited my brother yesterday. HOOKER: He any better? BEAR: About the same. I always feel so guilty after seeing him. HOOKER: Why's that? BEAR: All he talks about is how boring it is there and what a relief from boredom it is to have me visit. He makes me feel like I should be visiting every day. The thing is, I can understand why he's bored. Activities amount to exercising, bingo, cards, and Bible study. He sometimes plays pinochle once a week. That's about it. HOOKER: Sounds boring to me, too. BEAR: Do you ever get bored? HOOKER: Rarely. You? BEAR: Sorry to say I do. Our Tuesday coffees often are the highlight of the week. The rest of the time, I'm climbing the walls. HOOKER: Now that surprises me. Doesn't your son live in Portland? BEAR:  He does. But I'm lucky if I hear from him once a month. HOOKER: Man, that's too bad. BEAR: I hear from my granddaughter more often, even when she's back east. HOOKER: I hear something like this and I don'...

Previous:  https://thoobasa.blogspot.com/2025/03/next-legacy-with-guest.html STEVE: Your suggestions really helped, and I'm so thankful. HOOKER: No trouble at all. BEAR: What did you end up doing? STEVE: Nothing's public yet, but I'm putting as much of his work as I can, including published work, onto a website I'll call "A Literary Archive." HOOKER: Excellent. STEVE: At another website I'm publishing something short every month. BEAR:'Something short? STEVE: Poems, short stories, journal things. BEAR: Sounds like you're going to be busy. STEVE: I found software that will do everything for me. I just have to input things in the order I want. HOOKER: I was going to suggest using software. STEVE: So Hooker, thank you, thank you, thank you. HOOKER: You're very welcome, welcome, welcome. (Pause.) STEVE: So how did you guys meet? HOOKER: Oh boy ... BEAR: We've been friends since grad school. HOOKER: Mid sixties at U of O in Eugene. Over half a c...

 BEAR: Did you see the guest editorial by Robert Charles in Sunday's paper? HOOKER: I don't read the paper any more. I don't watch television, and I don't listen to the radio. I don't do anything where there's a chance I will be exposed to news or images about the Golden Felon. BEAR: Well, listen to you. Does it work? HOOKER: No. What does Charles say? BEAR: He wants to expand physician-assisted suicide to include everyone.  HOOKER: Death with dignity for all! I like it. He give any details? BEAR: At age 80, whether sick or not, even if completely healthy, anyone is eligible to apply for death-with-dignity. HOOKER: That's too old. I'd do 70. Or make it part of retirement. BEAR: Are you serious? HOOKER: Of course I'm serious. We should have the right to manage our own deaths. BEAR:  God manages our death, Hooker. HOOKER: No, God manages man and gives him a mind capable of managing death for himself. BEAR: I guess we have to agree to disagree. HOOKER: ...

 BEAR: Did you watch the Blazers game last night? HOOKER: I don't follow the Blazers. BEAR: I thought you were a basketball fan. You used to be. HOOKER: I won't be an NBA fan again until they raise the basket. The game's turned into dunking and showing off. Today I follow women's basketball. It's still a team sport. BEAR: How about Caitlin Clark? HOOKER: She's spectacular.  BEAR: All those three pointers, some almost at half court. HOOKER: I'm talking about her passing. There are many good three point shooters but I've never seen anyone pass with her accuracy and consistency. She's the very definition of what a team sport looks like. BEAR: Granddaughter number two worships Clark. HOOKER: She plays? BEAR: First string on her high school team. I try not to miss a home game. HOOKER: I envy you. BEAR: Why don't you come to a game with me? HOOKER: I'd love to. BEAR: I think there are a couple games next week. I have to check my calendar. HOOKER: N...

 BEAR: When you lost Maggie, did you find yourself regretting that you hadn't told her certain things before she died? HOOKER: Oh yes. I think it's common. BEAR: After burying Liz, I couldn't remember the last time I'd told her I love her. I'm sure she knew I did but I was so upset about not telling her more often that my doctor treated me for depression. HOOKER: My dad was like that. He took me aside and told me not to make his mistake. So Maggie and I didn't have this problem, we told one another daily, often more than that. "Goodnight, I love you." I regreted something else. After retiring, she took up making jewelry. Good, I thought, she has a hobby to keep her busy. I didn't think much about it otherwise. BEAR: So what happened? HOOKER: I went through it after she died. Her jewelry was art! Moreover, she was selling it, she had business records. I should have paid more attention to all this when she was alive. BEAR: No marriage is perfect, is ...

 HOOKER: Bear, have you thought about what you're going to do when you decide you need help on a few things? BEAR: What I need help on right now is eating. I hate cooking. Meal delivery seems a little spendy. I eat a lot of meals you can microwave. Breakfast is best. Jimmy Dean sausage and gravy! It's really good. Or McDonald's drive through, Eggs and Sausage McMuffin. But by and large, my meals are not very healthy. Liz would be appalled. HOOKER: I have a plan for addressing this situation. BEAR: What's that? HOOKER: There must be fifty independent living retirement facilities in the Portland area. BEAR: My brother's in one. He's not terribly fond of living there. HOOKER: Hear me out. I toured one the other day and it ends up if you tour around noon, you get a free lunch. Here's the plan. We do coffee on Tuesdays, one week at your apartment, the next at mine. How about each Thursday we tour a living facility and get a free lunch? BEAR: A free lunch every we...